The first one is actually getting over cockroaches the size of my fist.
Two nights ago I was laying in my bed, peacefully reflecting about the day and brainstorming ideas for the theater workshop, which I started yesterday (I´ll get to it). I was listening to what wasn´t but might as well have been Enya (I´ll say it was for the affect) when a dear little thing – ok not so dear or little – fell from the ceiling/sky/only god knows right beside me onto the bed!
And the bed actually shook. I jumped up and promptly threw my book towards the intruder. But I guess these cockroaches are at the top of the insect foodchain and have gotten a bick cocky (pun intended), because he didn´t even flinch. I would have known if he had, these guys are big enough to have faces.
I threw a number of other objects at him, but he wasn´t impressed. I didn´t want to kill it – there´s a difference between a squashed bug and a dead corpse in your bed, and this was the latter.
Finally I turned the mattress upside down and he moved; he hid under my sheets, near the pillow.
I was tempted to run away screaming for help, and then I thought about it for a second and reasoned:
1) That idea is, for many obvious reasons, ridiculous.
2) Flies are more dangerous that cockroaches because they can carry parasites. Cockroaches aren´t harmful. They are just nasty.
3) Cockroaches are SO nasty.
4) OK, I should just get him off my bed and then who cares what he does.
So I threw a tape dispenser. The noise woke up the rest of the house (oops) but the bug who wanted to share my bed was unaffected. I lifted the mattress and shook it as hard as I could. He finally fell on the floor with a THUD and climbed into the tablecloth of my bedside stand.
I pretended I hadn´t seen that and that he was outside.
Project Number One: CHECK. I´m over it.
The next morning my homestay mom asked me if I had slept badly. After the incident, I had actually slept like a log. ¨No, I slept very well thanks.¨
¨Oh. I thought there was an animal in your room last night because I heard you trying to kill something.¨
¨Oh, that was just a cockroach who wanted to share my bed. He wasn´t invited.¨
¨That was all for a cockroach?¨She had a good laugh. ¨I thought it was the animals!¨
Project number two: Getting over animals who make their way into my room (?) that may be more dangerous than cockroaches.
I´ll let you know how it goes.